Sex talk
Speaking of Edging

Simon Sheppard, QSyndicate.com

"Oh God, I'm gonna...I'm gonna...I'm gonna..."

For those of us who like to remain on the brink, who believe the journey's more important than the goal, "edging" can fill the boy-meets-boy bill. The postponement of orgasm, especially at the hands of someone else, can make a hot scene hotter, prolonging the ecstasy to near-agony levels.

"I really enjoy running elaborate edging scenes," says one kinky man who's handy with rope. "I'll tie a guy down to the bed so he can't touch himself or push me away, then play with him but not allow him to come until he's begging me for release."

Not all edging gets quite so kinky, but many a man enjoys making a guy almost shoot, backing off, then ramping up again, and on and on. While any sort of sex can be part of an edging scene, often masturbation is the weapon of choice. As one edging expert points out, "It's pretty easy to edge when you're giving someone a hand job, since you have all that control´┐Żjust the right pressure in just the right place, then pulling back."

At the hands of a master masturbator, an almost-but-not-quite session can be quite a thrill. "My boyfriend knows how to prolong the buildup to orgasm," enthuses one edgee. "It can get so intense that I'm gasping for air. And when I finally do come, it's unbelievably intense."

Skilled edging tops tend to be sensitive to feedback, since one false move can result in a quick and sticky conclusion. When a guy is getting close, variations in touch, such as a feather-light stroking of dickhead or shaft, or even a near-painful squeeze, can postpone the penis's pumping. And when a cock is just about to shoot, backing off and stimulating other parts of the body – nipples, asshole, whatever – keeps the erotic tension high while the sap subsides.

The best edging tops usually are enthusiastic, experienced masturbators themselves. Party-of-one practice can not only make perfect, it can teach where and how to stroke to keep things just on the brink. Our edging expert recalls, "It all started with me prolonging my own jack-off sessions. I'd lock myself in the bathroom and go at it for hours, one delicious thrill after another after another. It got so I was getting blisters on my equipment. And then I decided I might as well do the same thing to other guys." He smiles. "But it's only recently that I learned it has a name."

Being a successful edging bottom requires its own set of skills. Some guys are going to come quickly, no matter what they do. The rest of us, though, can learn to slow down the rush toward orgasm. Once again, exploring solo can help. Deep breathing can delay things, as can shifting your concentration. ("Think about something besides how your prick feels," advises our edgee.) And some men have found that tightening pelvic muscles can subdue the urge to squirt.

But pleasurable as solo edging can be, two-man scenes can be even more fun. Whether the deed is done through a hand job or a blow job, the buildup to shooting can be exquisitely pleasurable torture. Communication, whether in words or nonverbally, is certainly central to success. And a certain amount of sadomasochistic subtext can keep things even hotter. "I love it when a man just begs me to let him come," says the kinky edger-with-ropes. "And I love it even more when I tell him no."

Getting there is, proverbially, half the fun. And the bliss of a prolonged journey to jism can be fun with a capital "Fuck"!

Simon Sheppard is the author of Kinkorama: Dispatches from the Front Lines of Perversion

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