Sex talk
Speaking of Getting Rimmed

Simon Sheppard, QSyndicate.com

Sometimes there's nothing better, buttwise, than kicking back for a nice long session of tongue-in-cheek.

"I'd always found getting my ass eaten just sort of nice," recalls one man. "But then I met this one fellow who was really into rimming. He could go at it for literally an hour and not get tired. It was just totally amazing. I'd never felt anything so great."

Oral-anal sex can be unappealing to nonenthusiasts, and even experienced rim-fans can have moments of squeamishness. But the transgressive edginess can be part of the fun, too. Our happy rimmee remembers, "I lay there thinking where my partner had put his mouth, and that only made it hotter."

Many of us have mixed feelings about our nether regions, so letting someone kiss your hole can bring up questions as well as hard-ons. "Is it safe? Am I clean down there? What if I fart?"

Safety first. While the one getting rimmed can conceivably get herpes, it's the man who's putting his mouth where a hole is who's taking the major risk. That means that the guy getting rimmed should be a good scout – even signs of minor indigestion should be reason enough to take a rimming rain check. And really good scouts will get themselves inoculated against hepatitis – a good idea whatever you're into.

Cleanliness is pretty easy to guarantee. Unlike fucking, there's no deep penetration, so a good soap-and-water washing should do the trick. No douching required. (And shaved holes are even easier to keep spic-and-span.) Of course, many of us are taught early on that "it's dirty down there," so lingering anxiety may occur. But why not just relax and enjoy some oral service?

Then there are those who don't want you to be clean: Kinky as it might seem, there are rimmers into eating dirty butt. Some rimmees find nonhygienic homosex hot, too, though most folks shun it. As with any edgy stuff, it's your call. But should you give it a shot, keep in mind that it requires a bit of excretory timing, and having a healthy gut is even more important than usual. Says one funky-bottomed top, "He said he wanted to be my 'toilet paper,' so I figured I'd see what it was like. It was, in fact, hot, kind of...but I'm not really sure I'd do it again."

Getting eaten might seem like a purely passive position, but many a randy rimmer craves a response. The butt-eater in question will not, of course, be able to see the look of delight on your face, so why not encourage him with a few enraptured moans and a sincere-sounding "Damn! That feels great." You may feel like you're in a porn video, but it will most likely encourage your buddy to tongue you even better. And when he's hit just the right spot, let him know it with a happy, "That's it! Right there!"

Physical feedback counts, too. Reaching back and spreading your cheeks is a sure sign you'd like Mr. Tongue to probe deeper, while gently pumping your hips makes it all more of a delightful dance. Adjusting your position – say, from doggy-style to on your back – lends variety, and can make you both more comfy. But don't expect endurance miracles. Some guys' tongues get tired pretty quickly, while others can feast for hours. Who knows – you might get so worked up you'll be tempted to turn the tables, or engage in a bit of anal sixty-nining.

Is getting rimmed a giant step past neat-and-clean acceptability, or one of the best feelings there is? Well, maybe it's a bit of both. So why not put your booty where someone else's mouth is?

Oh, and if you should someday fart at an awkward moment? Well, bud, it happens to the best of us.

Simon Sheppard is the author of Kinkorama: Dispatches from the Front Lines of Perversion

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