Sex talk
Speaking of Playing Doctor

Simon Sheppard,

Open up and say "ahhhh."

Playing doctor isn't just for curious kids. Kinky gay men also get a charge out of medically themed shenanigans. The scene can be as simple as impromptu verbal doctor/patient role play, or as involved as full-fledged operating-theater theater, complete with props like white jackets, rubber gloves, medical instruments – even an examination table. To dedicated practitioners of "physician"-attended prick-play, there are few phrases sweeter than, "Lie back, relax, and put your feet in the stirrups."

One such phony physician recalls, "It all started years ago when I went to a sex club that featured a well-equipped 'exam room.' I was watching two men doing a doctor/patient scene, and I just got so very, very turned on. Now I own my own medical bag, complete with a stethoscope and a speculum for buttplay. And there's nothing I like better than snapping on a rubber glove and giving a nice, long, deep prostate exam. I guess you could say I'm an M.D. – if that stands for 'mighty depraved.'"

It's not tough to diagnose why some guys get off on playing doctor. Beyond the erotic echoes of childhood licentiousness, there's also the physician's unique position: He's allowed full access to every part of our bodies, inside and out, and it's all for our own good. For most us, a doctor was the very first stranger to touch our dickies, perhaps provoking a strange, forbidden thrill. And for some, dealing with a doc still is sexually charged. So re-creating that power relationship in the playroom can be a healing treat, an RX for randiness.

The secret thrills of medical messing-around can carry over to the objects involved, too. There are fellows who fetishize hospital gear, from those awkward-to-wear gowns to experts-only gizmos like catheters and sounds. Then, too, there are complex, kinky scenes – from temporary piercings to putting body parts in casts – that may not feature a designated doctor, but have strong medical overtones. Scenes can even feature mutually-agreed-upon malpractice, with the man who's pledged to relieve pain dispensing a dose of discomfort instead.

In any case, a nicely negotiated show-the-doctor-your-dick scene gives both participants permission to play out a long-established ritual of dominance and submission. Like a visit to a genuine physician, it's both reassuring and a bit threatening to the patient. "I'm a very dominant type in my day-to-day life," says one eager patient, "so there's something very hot and relaxing about letting someone take over and operate on me till I reach orgasm."

For his part, the doctor-for-a-day has thrilling access to his patient's body, a fabulous fee for any dominant faux physician. "After I make my patient pee in a cup," says another doctor top, "I'll have him sit there while I give his cock, balls, and hole a thorough examination. If he gets a hard-on – and they always do – I just explain to him that it's nothing to be worried about, just a normal part of the process. And that perhaps I should further gauge his reactions with some oral stimulation..."

There's no doubt about it – physicians have a prominent place in our collective libido. It's little wonder that many of our TV idols, from Dr. Kildare to Dr. McDreamy, are "medical men." And for those of us who prefer our eroticism more explicit, the Web offers medical-play porn sites. It's an easy prognosis: For the impatient patient and the cock-care provider alike, playing doctor is a perfect prescription for penis-stiffening fun.

Sex. It's just what the doctor ordered.

Simon Sheppard is the author of Kinkorama: Dispatches from the Front Lines of Perversion

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